Going to the Mattresses

There are advantages and disadvantages to being a single woman, but for the most part I have no qualms about flying solo.

I’m learning to scale down recipes and cook for one instead of four. I can drink directly out of the milk carton or dominate the TV remote. If I go to the movies or dine out alone, I don’t have to share my popcorn or dessert. And I can sleep smack dab in the middle of the bed and hog all the blankets. It’s that bed, however, that causes me grief in my state of oneness.

It is recommended that you flip your mattress every six months in February and August, which should not be confused with the rotating done in May and November. Flipping is turning the mattress over so the top surface becomes the bottom surface, while rotating is merely spinning it 180° so the head ends up at the foot of the bed. Both help to prolong the life of your mattress by allowing it to recoup from the constant pressure of your body and prevent creating a groove which can be uncomfortable to sleep on (in?). But enough hints from Heloise.

I don’t always adhere to proper flipping/rotating protocol, but when craters start to form I know it’s time to take action. Rotating I can handle with ease, but I have a king-size bed and am a wimpy girl. It’s quite the challenge to flip my Sealy Posturepedic by my lonesome. Sometimes I’ll corral assistance from whoever happens to be in the vicinity: my dad, my sister, my ex, my neighbor, the pizza delivery boy. Other times I just have to tackle it alone. Think Sumo wrestling. It usually takes a lot of pushing and heave-ho-ing and grunting (and swearing) until it is successfully repositioned. Needless to say, I can typically skip my workout that day.

The thing I religiously attend to on a semi-annual basis, however, is a trip to the laundromat. Yes, I have a high tech, state-of-the-art, front-load washer and dryer, but they don’t easily accommodate the bulky stuff. With the heavy duty equipment at my local Suds-O-Rama and a handful of quarters, I can tackle all the comforters at once and be on my merry way in an hour. I can’t imagine having to utilize this for my laundry needs on a regular basis, but it’s really not so bad … especially when a quarter gets stuck in the dryer and eventually spits out 55 cents. It's better than playing the slots in Vegas!

Ahhhhh … a comfy mattress sporting clean, lavender-scented bedding. I think I’m going to call it an early night!